Senioritis: a silent but deadly killer

Claire Geare, editor-in-chief

If you’re anything like me, it’s March of your senior year and you’d do anything to speed this whole high school thing along. The only thing keeping me going are these half days, and if you don’t have one of those then… are you okay?
College application season is finally over, so you’d think I’d have a little more free time. Except, what they never tell you about is scholarship application season. You’d think it was enough to get into the school, now I have to sell myself to a dozen admissions committees that I won’t even ever see. This endless rigamarole of essays and recommendation letters and
Plus, I really thought that my senior year would be easier. In fact, part of me thought we did a second semester just for show. After winter break, I really expected Mr. Lavigne to put on a fake mustache and tell us to write a report on The Hungry Hungry Caterpillar. You know, in case administration were to swing by. But to my surprise, it turns out school keeps going.
The dichotomy of being both forced into some sort of maturity bootcamp and still following a school bell is agonizing. One minute, I’m pulling my hair out over my future and the next I’m taking a vocabulary test. I’m looking to rent an apartment, yet I have to ask to go to the bathroom. All is not lost though, dichotomy was on last week’s vocab test, so I guess I learned something.
What sucks most is the fact that I’m a total nerd. Oh yeah, senior ditch day? I’ll be busy at the district office taking a four hour test on macroeconomics. Putting down that enrollment deposit at ASU? I’ll be trying to figure out how to afford $40,000 a semester in housing. And that sweet freedom of adulthood? Well, I just turned 17. If I could go back in time and tell first grade me to throw those gifted test results, I would. At least she’d never know the pain of having to take your father with you to enter the roller rink.
If I had one tip for any non-senior reading this, it would be this: if you’re thinking of going to an out of state school, don’t. I say this as someone who’s going out of state. Sure, going to NYU sounds fun and all until they starve you to death during the inevitable fourth wave of the pandemic. If I’ve learned anything while here at Cactus Shadows, it’s that any senior going to ASU is probably the smartest person in the world. It’s inexpensive, nearby, a top university, and troublingly easy to get into if you’re in state. I promise you, the worst decision I am yet to make is leave this stupid hot state. It’s not worth the cash, at least if this whole “economics” magic turns out to be true. (In an effort to avoid rescinded admission, I will clarify that this is a joke. Mostly.)
The tragic ending to this tale is that there is no solution. Senioritis sucks, but fail one more vocab test and the rest of your life is screwed forever. So, my dear Seniors, we must brave this laziness together. Let us unite, hand in hand, to procrastinate literally any single assignment.